We Regret to Inform You

Imagine for a moment that you’re David Beckham. Once of Manchester United. Former captain of England. Currently with Real Madrid (well, sort of) and soon off to an exciting new career in America. Life isn’t so bad. You’re world famous. You’ve won a few medals. Got a few bob in the bank. Glamorous wife. Nice kids. Things could be a lot worse. A case, on the whole, of having just a few regrets, but as the song says, “too few to mention.”

Until you pick up the paper and see the England team. The one your mate McClaren has picked to play, ironically, against Spain. As you begin to scan through the names, you only get as far as the left back and then you freeze. Unbelievable. It’s Phil Neville, brother of Gary and your former United team mate. Phil Neville! Selected to play for England at left back. No spring chicken certainly, but evidently still good enough to play for England in McClaren’s brave new world.

Whereas you, apparently, definitely aren’t.

What was that line about regrets?