Think of a Title

Jose Mourinho, the self-styled ‘Special One’ and greatest manager in the history of the game, has been snubbed and he simply cannot understand it. Alex Ferguson, manager of the team he has branded as ‘lucky’ Manchester United, possibly because they are current Premiership leaders by a massive 9 points and favourites for the title, is a knight of the realm. Arsene Wenger, whom he once described as a ‘voyeur’, is awarded the OBE, the Gunners’ stunning new ground is officially opened by the Duke of Edinburgh and to cap it all the Arsenal manager, directors and first team squad are given tea and are presented to the Queen at Buckingham Palace.

You have to feel sorry for the interpreter. Perhaps Her Majesty could create a special title for him. He could be officially addressed as ‘Your Arrogance’ or possibly become ‘Little Sir Envy’, the shortest knight of the year.