Gerrard's Rescue Mission

On 28th March 2007, England, the nation that gave football to the world, the country with a population of around 51 million and arguably the best and most competitive league on earth, played Andorra, population 70,000, FIFA ranking 163rd. The game took place in Barcelona because the capacity of the Andorrans’ national stadium stands at some 1500 and to make the home side’s task even more formidable, it was weakened by the absence of one of only two full-time professional players it can normally call upon.

It took 53 minutes for the team of English plutocrats to break the resistance of the Andorran part-timers. The opening goal was fashioned by a delightful square lay-off from Wayne Rooney and finished beautifully on the volley by Steven Gerrard, who had been permitted at last to play in the central midfield role which suits him best and where he is world class. And it surprised no-one that when the second goal came 23 minutes later, it was Gerrard who burst through the stubborn Andorra defence to lift the gloom a little. Steven Gerrard was the reason for and the inspiration of this victory, which finished 3-0 in time added on after the unfortunate Andorran keeper fumbled Defoe’s shot and allowed Nugent to mark his debut with a tap in from less than a metre.

However you dress it up, a score of 3-0 against opposition of this calibre is shameful and parading feeble excuses about the difficulties experienced by Premiership players, many of whom receive (the word ‘earn’ is in most cases inappropriate) in excess of £100,000 a week, in breaking down a massed defence of part-timers is, to say the very least, deeply embarrassing. It was in truth a turgid and dreary performance rescued by the brilliance of Gerrard from the very brink of disgrace.

As for the future, while no civilised person can condone the manner of some of the criticism directed at the England manager, it is clear that Steve McClaren is in over his head – something which, deep down he knows even if he will not acknowledge it publicly – and the England team will continue to under-achieve on a massive scale until it is led by a manager of true international stature. Therefore the greatest service he can do to the England team is to resign and if for whatever reason he will not do so, the Football Association, who are really to blame for appointing him in haste, should remove him and lose no time in seeking a worthy successor.