Chelsea

Remember all those Christmas games of Monopoly? Sitting round the table, hoping to build a ruthless property empire and bankrupt the rest of the family?

Chelsea don’t. Thanks to Roman Abramovic it’s a way of life, an everyday occurrence. And it’s deadly serious. About as far removed from a game as you can get.

So when reports alleging that Chelsea covet Arsenal’s Thierry Henry and would be delighted to pay him £150,000 a week to defect to south-west London appear the day before the two sides meet at Highbury, it surprises no-one. The cynics are even moved to suggest that such revelations are timed to have the maximum destabilising effect upon the opposition. Perish the thought.

Monopoly, you must be joking. It’s only The Angel Islington against Mayfair, Park Lane and the entire community chest.

Just a bit of fun, really.

If that’s what you like.