Ole Jose

Rumour has it that now the Special One has got his team into a virtually impregnable position in the premiership, he’s getting a bit bored.

The trouble is that these days even his crusades about the multiple injustices meted out to Chelsea (including the shameful treatment of Michael Essien, for example) and his well publicised rants about certain rival managers don’t seem to stimulate him the way they used to.

He’s tried tinkering with his Christmas card list (the football equivalent of the New Year’s Honours). He’s publicly castigated Joe Cole for daring to entertain, when the boy knows perfectly well that there’s room for only one showman at Chelsea. All to no avail.

So in desperation he’s turned his attention to the club’s fans who, according to reports, are no longer to be permitted the pleasure of shouting ‘Ole’ when Chelsea put a few passes together.

Where will it all end? Will they all be required to turn up dressed in sombre black? Will they wait in respectful silence for a signal from a little man in the technical area before breaking into applause?

What next for the Fun Factory?