The Terryification of England Debutants

Apparently, England’s captain John Terry wants to make new players sing in front of the squad. Just like they have to do at Chelsea. Presumably, this is part of some cockeyed psychology designed to build character and forge team spirit. We could call it the Chelsification, or even Terryfication, of England – a prelude no doubt to winning ways and effective uninspiring football, but alas nothing to do with entertainment.

Who knows what other challenges Terry’s new style captaincy might bring. Busking outside Old Trafford? Skinny dipping in the Manchester Ship Canal? Bungee jumping? Surviving an interview without using the word ‘obviously’ more than ten times? Auditioning for the part of Maria in ‘The Sound of Music’? Writing an autobiography without recourse to a ‘ghost’?

One thing’s for sure. This particular brand of pseudo-psychology didn’t do Terry himself much good when he first faced the cameras as England captain. He looked like a rabbit caught in a car’s headlights.

Perhaps he should have opened with a song.